Mi Linda 5/3/2023 12:30am
You're so beautiful I can't deny you.
You're eyes sparkle like grass when its frozen.
I hope I'm not imposing...
The door behind you is closing,
Yet I can't stop my body
from mowing straight through
The obstacles meant to keep me from you.
But I will continue to do so... Because I think you like it.
I think you like
that I'm awkward as can be around you
I can barely breathe around you
I ferment in every word you speak; Drunkenly
making me meek and more shy around you
and yet,
I still have the audacity
to lie here, acting a fool
To make you smile
When I know you'd rather not.
But I'm so caught
In your words like webs
Stringing me up,
all sticky
just to watch me wriggle.
It makes me giggle
I don't mind being watched by you
Let alone being tied up
For you love, just call me a mutt
Because I'm attracted to you and I'm stuck.
Call it a rut
Infinitely teased
But I always aim to please.
Although I'm not so narcissistic as to think
That I can link that brilliant smile to me indefinitely.
Or that you were, ever truly
looking at me in the first place.
Sorry that's my insecurity.
She's normally not that mean,
but when you're standing next to me
she seems to suddenly have the urge to speak.
Saying all the things we've all heard before.
That as soon as I'm not new,
you won't want me anymore.
This is her favorite store
The sales floor is called Social Media
and you better believe they'll stampede ya
The second she walks in
They all know her here, she's the main topic
in all of their strategy meetings.
I try to heed her whispered warnings
as of late
or is that anxiety talking?
Shit I hate that I can't tell them apart sometimes.
They are twins after all
But trust me when they get together
and get that ball rolling
it is not a ball and I normally never have any fun at all.
Even though the both of them point and laugh with glee saying,
"It's just a joke silly!"
I need some new company
and I look to you, cause no one has made me laugh like you do.
...
I think this "I like you." is laced;
With something that
I know I won't ever be able
to easily replace,
And that terrifies me.
That's exactly why
I will not race,
I will walk.
I want to talk with you,
To climb rocks with you.
To toss off our soaked socks when we get caught in the rain,
to soak in old records playing,
and soak in your complaints about the world
and all of us flawed people in it.
Who are so stained and soaked through
from the all out food fight
That this life has so far turned into.
But I have to ask...
If I feed you baby, will you feed me?
Will you still look at me in forty years gleefully?
Sorry that's just my anxiety at play.
My brain just keeps screaming at me to ask if you'll stay.
But that's to much pressure some would say.
So for now, I lay low.
Climbing under a table as a huge tray of food flew.
I dodge just in time
the words in my brain going blank... Huh who knew?!
As I duck under this messy table and see the fine details of your face.
Little did I know that this whole time you were seeking shelter too.
So since we're both here... Do you mind if I grab on to you?
Is it ok if I never let go?
Is it alright, if I sometimes don't know how to show how I feel.
It's really hard being real.
But when you're down, know that I will always bake you a fresh meal.
So what do you say?
"You wanna escape this disarray?"
I asked as I held out my hand shaking slightly.
But to my chagrin you held it tightly.
As we bolted towards the bolted door.
You said to me,
"Are you sure you're fine with me?"
I looked back with a grin,
"I will be both your knight in the most grim of nights and your loyal steed!
I will be beasty boy when you are Raven in the most need.
I will be your tavern maiden when you yell out for more mead.
I will be the guard dog who is highly trained only by your command!
I will be the wave that brushes your feet gently in the wet sand.
I will be all of those things and more! We just need to make it to the other side of this door!"
You're always stoic face broke into that brilliant smile as you stepped over a food pile.
"Then come with me, because a little birdy told me
your honesty was the key."
To my surprise she pulled out a silver key right before my eyes.
Grinning wickedly she whispered, "I will warn you."
Glancing at the war waging around us she looked back to me.
"It'll be a lot more messy within me, than in here.
Yes I have a halo, but I also have horns you should fear."
"I'm not scared of a mess." I say pulling you to me
as a rotted passion fruit flew right past
where you used to be.
This passion will not be a fling,
this passion will be allowed to sing.
Will be allowed to breathe.
This passion will...
As she turned the key I knew.
This passion will free me.
"With your halo we will try Heaven.
And if they will not let us in,
then I will hold your hand down those winding steps
and be your personal escort to sin and to Hades.
And there... We will see what kind of Hell we raise."
